Commencement

Today is Whit Sunday, the first day of Pentecost. In the Saint Cecilia Chapel, the Old Ivy Bach Chorale performs J.S.Bach's cantata BWV 34 O Ewiges Feuer, O Ursprung der Liebe, which translates roughly as Oh Eternal Flame, Oh Source of Love. Mrs. Dowager sings the Alto aria, one of the ringers sings the Tenor recitative and Zack sings the bass recitative.

Once again there is no Soprano solo, so Emily sings in the Chorus. Emily is grumpy today; "eternal flame" reminds her of that chlamydia infection.

Mr. Twitchy of the Theology faculty delivers the inspirational message for today. He steps to the lectern, places his note thereupon, clears his throat, and reads aloud:

And when the day of Pentecost was fully come, they were all with one accord in one place. And suddenly there came a sound from heaven as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled all the house where they were sitting. And there appeared unto them cloven tongues like as of fire, and it sat upon each of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, and began to speak with other languages, as the Spirit gave them utterance. And there were dwelling at Jerusalem Jews, devout men, out of every nation under heaven. Now when this was noised abroad, the multitude came together, and were confounded, because that every man heard them speak in his own language.

He pauses, and takes a sip of water. "I don't really get this, so let's move on to the other reading for the day, from John 14:23-31:

Jesus answered him, “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. Whoever does not love me does not keep my words. And the word that you hear is not mine but the Father's who sent me.

“These things I have spoken to you while I am still with you. But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. You heard me say to you, ‘I am going away, and I will come to you.’ If you loved me, you would have rejoiced, because I am going to the Father, for the Father is greater than I. And now I have told you before it takes place, so that when it does take place you may believe. I will no longer talk much with you, for the ruler of this world is coming. He has no claim on me, but I do as the Father has commanded me, so that the world may know that I love the Father. Rise, let us go from here."

Mr. Twitchy pauses and looks around the Chapel. "Isn't that nice? Let's hear it for Jesus!" The congregation breaks out into thunderous applause.

Mr. Pipes ends the service with a vigorous recessional.

Today is also Old Ivy's Commencement Day, when students, parents and alumni gather to recognize the few who actually manage to secure a degree. Commencement ceremonies are held in the Quadrangle, by the Thinking Tree. The Old Ivy Chamber Orchestra provides the music; Roderick joins, playing second clarinet.

Commencement begins precisely at noon, with a processional of the faculty and graduates as the Chamber Orchestra plays the Funeral March from Beethoven's Third. The music is appropriately somber, to recognize the many who enrolled, but did not graduate.

In lieu of the conventional tam, the Old Ivy faculty vie with one another for the most ridiculous hats. This year, Miss Quimm of the English Lit faculty appears to be in the lead:

Miss Quimm's course in erotic fiction is consistently one of the most popular courses at Old Ivy, though it carries no degree credit.

However, the Political Economy faculty steals the show:


This year, the Commencement Committee sent speaking invitations to President Obama, Senator Marco Rubio, Governor Chris Christie and Angelina Jolie. None responded, so, per custom, the Committee selected Mr. Droop of the Philosophy department at random. Mr. Droop steps to the lectern.

"Class of 2013, you are full of yourselves today. But soon you will learn that life is short and that all of your accomplishments are pointless. In the Universe, whether you graduated today or not is a matter of complete indifference. Now go kill yourselves. Or not. It's all the same to me."

The Chamber Orchestra concludes the ceremony with the final dance from Ravel's Daphnis and Chloe, which is somewhat challenging as a recessional as it is in 5/4 time.

Meanwhile, in Beauneville, Mr. Smiley sits at this customary table in the Cafe Venice and sips his Caffe Mocha. It's nice.