I Think It's A Metaphor

Today is Cantate, the fourth Sunday after Easter, so named because...well, you know. Here is the first line of the Gregorian introit for the day, from Wikipedia. Where they got it, I do not know. The theme of the day is something to do with the joy of singing.



The Old Ivy Bach Chorale performs the J.S.Bach cantata BWV 108 Es ist euch gut, daß ich hingehe, which translates to "It is good that I leave." Zack sings the bass aria, Mrs. Dowager sings the alto arias and one of the ringers sings the tenor recitatives. Emily does not bother to ask what the text of this cantata has to do with the joy of singing.

Back in Beauneville, Mr. Smiley, Clotilde and little Alexander attend services at the Church of Irony. Before the service, Clotilde takes Alexander to Sunday School and leaves him with Mrs. Ripper, the preschool teacher. "Say goodbye to Mommy, Alexander," says Mrs. Ripper. "You may never see her again."

According to the bulletin, today's sermon is When Everything Is Ironic, Nothing Is Ironic. Mr. Smiley looks forward to something deep. However, at the appointed time in the program, Mr. Feckless simply tells a few jokes and juggles three red balls.

Meanwhile, Megan has decided to scrap the first chapter of her book and start again. She writes:

The brook. Nice, lovely brook. Nice, lovely, gurgling brook full of water. Wet water. Lovely wet water. Nice, lovely gurgling brook full of lovely wet water. Nice lovely brook gurgles forth from mountain spring and gurgles and gurgles and gurgles and gurgles and gurgles and gurgles through the nice lovely countryside. Nice lovely countryside with a lovely green dell through which the nice lovely brook gurgles and gurgles and gurgles.

Wagner's musical style suits Megan's literary bent.

Flowers. Pretty flowers. Pretty flowers in the dell through which the nice lovely brook full of lovely wet water gurgles. And blackberry bushes, loaded with plump, juicy, yummy black blackberries. And a pile of gold.

Three bunnies frolic and gambol in the dell, by the brook, near the blackberries, amidst the flowers and around the pile of gold. Their names are Flipsy, Flopsy and Fellatia..

Megan pauses. No, she thinks. That won't work.

Their names are Flipsy, Flopsy and Cottontail.

Flipsy: What's this gold doing here?

Flopsy: Shut up, I'm frolicking.

Cottontail: Big Daddy Bunny left it here. We're supposed to protect it from thieves.

Flipsy: That's stupid. We're just bunnies.

Cottontail: Don't worry, Big Daddy put a spell on it.

Flipsy: What kind of spell?

Flopsy (in mid-gambol): Will you two keep it down? I'm trying to focus.

Cottontail: Anyone who forges a ring from the gold will rule the world...

Flipsy: Oh, well I feel so much better.

Cottontail: ...but everyone will hate them.

Flopsy (stops frolicking): How do you know that?

Cottontail (pointing): It says so on this little sign.

Albert, a big fat ugly black bunny enters.

Albert: Who's up for sex?

Megan pauses, and smiles. She likes that line.

Flopsy: Sir, this is a children's book.

Flipsy: Also, you're ugly.

Albert: Well, if sex is out of the picture I'll just take this gold and be off.

Flipsy: You can't take that gold, it's special.

Albert: What's so special about it?

Cottontail (reading aloud): 'He who forges a ring from this gold shall rule the world...'

Flipsy: Shut up, you're just encouraging him.

Albert (reaching for the gold): Well, in that case...

Cottontail: '...but will be hated by all."

Albert (filling a sack with the gold(: What do I care, everyone hates me anyway.

Flipsy and Cottontail: Alas!

Albert: Well, I'm off! I shall forge a ring, rule the world and work my evil ends! (Exits)

Flopsy: Good riddance, creep. And who cares about the gold, we're bunnies, what would we do with it?

Flipsy: I think it's a metaphor.

Cottontail: We must go to Big Daddy and warn him. (Exeunt)

With Chapter One in the can, Megan joins the others at the Old Ivy Inn for lunch. Emily is there as well. She's thinking it must be over with Zack, as he did not fondle her buttocks today.