On Fridays, the Blooms and Smiths dine at the Red Trolley Diner. Since Roderick and Molly like to go the the Friday night "bowling party" in Stapleton, the dinner party begins at five sharp. At four forty-five, the Blooms and Smiths meet up at the corner of Elm and Fourteenth.
It's a lovely September afternoon, nice and cool. The shadows are getting longer as Fall approaches.
On the way to the Red Trolley, everyone speculates: Bella or Peaches? Will they be served by Bella, a tough, butchy dyke who wears black leather and rides a Harley? Or Peaches, her lovely blonde femme "friend"? Everyone hopes it will be Peaches.
It's Bella.
At the Red Trolley Diner, the blue plate dinner special is always wonderful, but one should not ask what it is. Those who do are not served, and risk permanent loss of their dining privileges. The elder Smiths and Blooms all order the blue plate, and are pleased to learn that its' pork and applesauce.
Roderick orders a hamburger.
Molly orders a twelve-ounce sirloin. Where she puts it is a mystery; Molly is slim, trim and svelte though she eats like a lion.
Mary orders a salad; Margaret, a hot dog; Catherine, macaroni and cheese, which she will share with Mr. Fuzzums.
With four full days of school completed, the moms and dads at the table want to know what the children think of their teachers.
Roderick is pretty happy. He's looking forward to Mr. Gibbon's History class, especially the military stuff. He also likes literature, and thinks Mr. Cooper is a good lecturer. Miss Agassiz is hot. Math is dull. Latin is very hard, and he's going to have to study a lot with Megan Cupcake.
Molly, in her fashion, is somewhat detached from the details of school. She's happy that Roderick is her study partner for Literature. Nude modeling seems to be going well; Mr. Botticelli is pleased that so many boys are developing a purely aesthetic appreciation of the nude female form.
Mary is very pleased that her teachers seem to have good moral values. She's not too happy with some of her classmates; some of the girls are so slutty, and the boys just seem to have one thing in mind. She'd like to go to the "bowling party" with Roderick and Molly, but feels she should visit Mrs. Peacock and read Elsie Dinsmore novels instead.
Margaret is completely bored with school because she has read about six weeks ahead in every class. Catherine wants to talk about her day, but nobody is listening except Mr. Fuzzums.
Between bites of pork, Mr. Smith asks Mary if she wants to be a nurse when she grows up.
Mary plays with her salad. "Actually, I think I'd rather be a prostitute", she says. "The money is better".
Mrs. Bloom frowns slightly. "You need to start young if that's what you want to do", she says. "The men like their girls on the younger side of twenty-five".
"I know", said Mary, in a manner that made clear that she had studied the matter.
"What about your Virginity Pledge?", asked Mr. Bloom, slurping his applesauce.
"They don't really check", said Margaret, who had never once spoken a word at these group dinners. Everyone looked at Margaret in astonishment. She frowned. "I can read, you know!".
Catherine didn't understand what everyone was talking about. She hugged Mr. Fuzzums.
"Well", said Roderick, pushing back his chair, "we should be going". Molly stood and stretched.
"Be careful in Stapleton", said Mrs. Smith. "There are some rough characters in that town".
Roderick patted his mom on the shoulder. "Don't worry, Mom. Megan's coming too, and she's strapped." Roderick likes that word -- strapped -- and felt pretty cool for using it in a sentence.
In the bus on the way to Stapleton, Roderick and Molly sat next to one another; Molly was feeling snuggly-wuggly, and snuggle-wuggled against Roderick. Megan Cupcake, who was also on the bus, did not notice; she was busy singing "ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall", even though there was not much chance they would get beyond ninety-three.
Amanda Dennis, however, scribbled in her notebook.
Later that evening, on returning from Stapleton, Molly invited Roderick to sleep over. They had pledged to one another, over the summer, to be each other's "first". But tonight would not be the night. Molly slept nude, and Roderick slept in his boxers.
