On Friday, Megan goes to visit with Mr. Nigel Hawthorne, Distinguished Lecturer in English Literature. At Old Ivy, they call Mr. Hawthorne "The Bard" for his thoughtful essays on college life; elsewhere, he is best known for his series of "Captain Rakewell" novels for young adults. Captain Rakewell is best described as a fusion of Horatio Hornblower and the Marquis de Sade; the books are written in a style reminiscent of the Hardy Boys, if you overlook the BDSM.
Prospective writers among the Old Ivy student body flock to Mr, Hawthorne's seminars, and seek his counsel, even though his advice is at best elliptical. Students revere his literary voice, his elevated prose, his mastery of the English language; and above all, they admire his ability to earn massive royalties by pandering to the tastes of adolescents, and desire to do the same.
Brushing back her red hair and checking to make sure her decolletage is sufficiently exposed, Megan knocks on Mr. Hawthorne's office door.
"Enter!" comes the booming, resonant, Shakespearean voice.
Megan obeys. Mr. Hawthorne, with scruffly grey beard and a longish curly mane, reclines in an executive style office chair, sandalled feet on desk. He wears something that looks like a cross between a daishiki and an aloha shirt, which is just long enough to make it unclear whether or not he wears anything else.
The room smells of cigar smoke, body odor and something else that smells familiar but Megan can't quite place. She wrinkles her nose and sniffs. Got it. Spermicide.
Mr. Hawthorne has the string to a yellow yo-yo in his right hand, and seems to be concentrating on his yo-ing. "Speak!" he commands.
Megan does so. "I want to be a writer, and my friends say I should come to you for advice."
Mr. Hawthorne performs a perfect "around the world" trick with the yo-yo. "You have smart friends. What is your question?"
"Is it better to publish something every day, or is it better to publish only good quality work?"
Mr. Hawthorne catches the yo-yo, then relaxes back into the chair, staring at a spot in the ceiling with intense eyes for a pregnant minute.
"Both," he says.
Megan thanks Mr. Hawthorne and departs.
